David's Peace Corps Adventure

Well, I'm done with the Peace Corps. It's all rather hard to believe that I am done with my service here in Paraguay and it hasn't fully hit me yet.
I wrote a final post about what it means, to me, to be a Peace Corps volunteer. It's rather long, but this is my finaly blog post so you all can get through it. Thanks all for checking this blog out, I hope that it gave you all a little glimpse into a country and it's culture which most Americans know nothing about.

What does it mean to be a Peace Corps Volunteer?

I've been asking myself this question since the day I decided to apply for the Peace Corps. Now, at the end of my 2 year service, I still mull over this question. It seems so simple at first; being a Peace Corps volunteer means going out and helping people in a different country and sharing each others' culture. While this answer is not incorrect, I don't think it encapsulates what it really means to be a PCV. So, over the two years here in Paraguay I have compiled what it means, to me, to be a Peace Corps Volunteer.
It's important to make clear that these ideas are what it means to me to be a PCV. The Peace Corps experience is wholly individual. This is something we learn quite early on in service. I personally learned it through a more frustrating route than others. During the first few months in site I was frustrated with my service. Why wasn't I doing what other volunteers were able to do in their sites? I was comparing myself to the volunteers I met during training, or to those who are in my same training group. I even compared myself to the PCVs who lived in my community over two decades ago! I can't really place when it finally became clear to me, but around my 4th month into service I had concluded that service was as individual as the volunteer. We are all different, and on top of that our communities are different. If I lived in a community where nobody wanted to work but I was able to get one family to try something new is my service considered “less” than a volunteer's in a community where everyone is on board and everyone is trying new things? Of course not. What I do as a volunteer depends on my personality, strengths and weaknesses, and those of my community, not to mention my country and the sector of work. My service has been radically different from another volunteer in the health sector only 30km away from me. So, how could I possibly tell you all what it means to be a Peace Corps Volunteer? I can't. But, maybe some things I say here are overarching and reach past our differences. Maybe some don't. I don't care. This is my blog.
Let's start off with a biggie – Being a Peace Corps Volunteer means being uncomfortable. I don't care where you serve, you are going to be uncomfortable. We are sent to different countries, with different cultures and languages, far from our comfort zone. When I was applying for PC what worried me most were the small discomforts: washing clothes by hand, no AC, using a latrine, potentially not having water or electricity etc. The funny thing is that those ended up being easy! In fact I enjoy using a latrine, and washing clothes by hand can be quite pleasant on a beautiful day. I consider these to be superficial discomforts. The most uncomfortable parts of service are the cultural differences and language barrier. Both of these can be eased, but there will always be those differences which continue to bother us. These discomforts are usually what make or break our will to continue on with service. It was during a very itchy incident with bedbugs that I came to my own “epiphany” regarding discomforts throughout service. At the time I was miserable; I couldn't sleep and couldn't get rid of these bugs. I wanted to go home. And, as I sat in my chair on a rainy day scratching myself uncontrollably, I came to a realization - Discomfort is a part of life no matter where you live. (“Took you that long to figure that one out, Captain Obvious?” you say) Though home sounded so great, I would eventually be put in similar uncomfortable situations and then what? If I couldn't deal with being uncomfortable here, where I knew I was going to be uncomfortable from the start, how would I deal with it back home? From then on it was no longer a discomfort but a proving ground. If I could get past this, I tell myself, then I could deal with just about any uncomfortable situation back home. That isn't to say that being a PCV is miserable and we suffer without end. I live pretty well here, and surely live better than other PCVs in different parts of the world. But being uncomfortable is an inevitable aspect of the experience and with that in mind we can choose to deal with it in a productive manner.
Being a Volunteer means doing a lot of nothing a lot of the time. This also relates to being uncomfortable. Americans like to do things. We like to get things done and we like to be active and work. Paraguayans, especially in the campo, are more than happy just sitting. They can be with relatives, or alone, or drinking terere, or just watching their chickens - it doesn't matter. They are content. As a volunteer I came to work, or at the least to get stuff done. Sitting at home reading can be enjoyable now and then, but when it becomes daily you start to question your service. “Why am I here? Am I really doing anything? What's the point?” As a PCV we move at the speed of our people. That can be incredibly hard when your people move a lot slower than you want. So, what do you do? You either let it go or you give them a little kick in the butt to get things moving. Regardless, you will be spending a lot of time doing what you originally considered “nothing”. There were days when washing my clothes was the highlight - Good enough for government work! It's only when we learn to let go of our American ideas of the pace of life do we really start to understand other cultures and, believe it or not, we become more productive as Peace Corps Volunteers.
Being a PCV means eating all kinds of crazy things! I can safely say I have eaten every part of a cow. EVERY part. Most of the time these foods are disagreeable and I regret ever putting them in my mouth, but every now and then we find a gem of gastronomical delight. One of my personal favorites are the heart clogging, finger-lickin good Chicharrones. For those of you who aren't familiar with them, these ultra-kosher morsels are chunksof fat and sometimes a sliver of meat from the pigs belly, which are deep fried...in their own fat. The end result is something with a hint of bacon and a whole lot of yummy! At the beginning of my two years I could only take one or two of these before I felt sick. I'm proud, and guilty, to say that I could almost take down a plate of these bad boys in one sitting. On the whole, most weird foods tend to stay weird and unappetizing. I'm not into organs, except for chicken hearts, and big boiled animal heads just don't do it for me.
Speaking of big heads, being a Peace Corps Volunteer means getting over your ego. We all come into this with romantic notions of saving our poor community members from life threatening situations. Some people also join the Peace Corps as a means to pump up their resume and add to their already inflated egos. I can tell you all right now that a beefed up resume won't be enough motivation to keep you through the two years. There are the small things, like being made fun of almost daily, which can really batter an ego. It's not until we can learn to laugh at ourselves or at least develop a thick skin that these don't become an issue. In the end, our ego can do more harm than good to ourselves and our community. We may come into our sites with all these ideas of what we think the community needs and what we want to do. None of these ideas or projects will be successful unless they are what the community wants. Even if I do all the work and force people to try new techniques as a way to brag about what I did as PCV, who cares? They more than likely won't continue on with what I taught once I am gone. An utter failure when we talk about sustainability. Our intentions have to be as selfless as possible in order for our community members to develop and succeed in the manner they want.
I touched on sustainability, which deserves it's own section. Being a PCV means trying to figure out what it means to be sustainable. Sustainability is the hot buzz word in the world of development work. But what does it mean to be sustainable? It's not as simple as you'd think. How sustainable our work is as PCVs is not a matter of black or white, right or wrong, but a sliding scale or a spectrum. The idea behind sustainable development work is that we as development workers provide our community members with techniques that can improve their lives and that they can continue to practice once we leave. The ideal goal is for them to work as if we were not even there. But, I have found that this can be very hard in some cases, and in others utterly impossible. I came across instances of this when working with my committees. The men's committee was strong and my role was minimal; I connected the right people, found helpful institutions, gave a couple classes on agricultural techniques. From there the men, more or less, took control. This would be considered “sustainable”. But my women's committees needed more attention. I ended up having to go door to door getting women to go to the meetings, or writing grants for them, or picking up goods for projects from Asuncion for them. This could easily be passed off as unsustainable practices. However, the results of these “unsustainable practices” are stronger committees with better work ethic and overall higher productivity. So, was I wrong to do what I did? I don't think so. I understand that unsustainable work can be unproductive and even a negative influence over time, but sometimes we as volunteers need to give that extra boost that our community members cant give themselves.
Here comes an obvious one – Being a Peace Corps Volunteer means being American and being proud of it. I left for the Peace Corps at the tail-end of the Bush Administration. At the time I was more than happy to get out of the country and, like most Americans, I had my qualms with the nation. I don't think I'd be wrong in assuming that most volunteers want to get away from the country; 2 years is a long time away from home. But the longer you are away the more things you miss and realize you like so much about home. You also can compare the U.S to your country of service and while you may find some things better in your new country, overall you realize that America is a great place and you should be proud to be American. For example, we love to bash the school systems in the U.S. After working in the schools here in Paraguay I thank the stars for the education I received in America. Though funding is cut almost every year, we go to schools where the teachers have more training than a basic highschool degree, and stay in the room during class to teach until class is over. Creativity is not only accepted but it is promoted. In Paraguay the teachers usually have only a basic highschool degree and no training in pedagogy or teaching methods. They write the days lesson on the board and have the children copy it down while the teachers go outside to drink terere and gossip. If the children finish early then they can run around without abandon. After this the children are given a good 30 minute recess to play soccer and back to class. The school day lasts for half a day, if that. Every child is expected to follow the lesson exactly as the teacher wrote on the board, any straying or creativity is not tolerated. Now, I'm sure there are some great teachers in this country but from what I have seen and experienced they are few and far between. I'm not saying that our motto should be “Hey, it could be worse.”. We shouldn't be complacent about qualms we have with our country. In America we have the ability to change things, and that is a beautiful thing. We have to remember that no country is perfect and hey, it could be worse!
This leads me to my final point – Being a Peace Corps volunteer means realizing how absolutely lucky we are. Now, before I get off my high horse I'm going to go a little higher. We are lucky to be PCVs; it's an amazing experience that is life changing. As I mentioned earlier, being in a developing country really helped me and many other volunteers to appreciate being American and how lucky we were to be born there. What sticks out the most to me, and is probably the most powerful, is that we Americans are lucky because we have the opportunity to help others. I'm not just talking about volunteering with the Peace Corps. There are endless possibilities to help and volunteer within our country and abroad. Most Americans, even in these hard economic times, have the ability to go and help others less fortunate than themselves. We have the ability to help others who can't help themselves or their families. After my two years here I have come to the conclusion that there is no action more special or fulfilling like voluntarily helping others. In fact, I'd like to go as far as saying that we have an obligation to do so. We were lucky in our birth, upbringing, nationality, and so forth. Because of that we owe it to those who may not be as lucky to give what we can. Okay, I'm afraid of heights and this high horse is getting a bit too high for me.
To come back down from there I want to tell you all a secret - What I did here anyone could do. I'm nothing special. My work these past two years had a lot to do with being in the right place at the right time with people who wanted to work. I couldn't, with clean conscience, take credit for the work that took place these two years. For the people of my community to willingly try new farming techniques or change their lifestyle says more about them than it does my work as a volunteer. When it comes down to it I'm actually quite lazy and have been known to self-indulge now and then in an air-conditioned hotel room in Asuncion watching American TV.
So, after these 2+ years in Paraguay, if I could leave you all with one piece of advice it would be this: go volunteer! It's so easy. As I mentioned earlier, it's the most fulfilling activity we can do and we have an obligation to help those who aren't as fortunate as us. Don't be content with sending in a check to some charity every year. I've worked with some of the charities that people send money to and I can say that for the most part you have no idea where that money is going, and it isn't always going to what you originally thought. For those of you who may have stumbled upon this blog and are thinking about joining the Peace Corps; do it! The motto is “The hardest job you'll ever love.” and as cheesy as it may sound, it's 100% true.

I was asked to host Long Field Practice again this year. LFP, for those that don't remember, is when a group of trainees go out to visit and work with a volunteer for about 5 days. This happens towards the end of their training and is a good way for them to really see how volunteers live/work as well as see what it's like to live in the campo since they all stay with families. This year I had two guys and two girls: Lauren, Sybil, Jonathan, and Jimmy. A language teacher also comes out and gives Guarani classes during the 5 days.
The one thing about LFP, which has to be emphasized to the trainees, is that in most cases a volunteer doesn't do this much "stuff" in a week. We really try to cram in activities and work just so they can get a good taste of what they might do in their service. In reality, a volunteer might do one or two of the activities in a week instead of 4 or 5. This LFP I had the trainees work bees with my neighbors, help me with a nutrition/cooking class for all the women's committees and schoolchildren, go into school and give a little mini-lesson on trash/the environment through song and dance, and plant the green manure Mucuna in between rows of corn. That's a lot of work for one week.
To be honest, finding the work was a bit of a stretch. My service is rapidly winding down and I'm not really trying to start new projects. Right now I'm mainly interested in being with my community members and enjoying my last two weeks just being with them. However, my community being the amazing community that it is, finding the work was not quite as hard as I thought it would be.

It's very hard to believe that my service is almost done; time flys. I'm feeling a lot of mixed emotions all at the same time. Obviously I am excited to be home and see family and friends, but at the same time I'm very scared and nervous. While sitting around the fire laughing and joking with my neighbors the other night I realized that this is my life. Not only am I used to living here and being a member of my community, I feel that this is who I am. Leaving my community will be much harder than it was when leaving home for the Peace Corps. I have no idea when I will come back here. I tell people I will return, and I plan on it..but when? I have to leave people I dearly care for and love and may never see them again.